Tuesday, August 29, 2006


it was like having sex with a horny smurf. hahahaha.... gotta love sex and the city.

so i feel like my writing today has been uninspired. emailing and so forth, i just felt like my spark was gone. i wasn't witty, i wasn't smooth, i wasn't nothin'.

but between that paragraph and this one, i ran this diagnostic thing that my computer told me i had to run. it was a huge pain in the ass and is finally finished wreaking havoc on my poor little baby, but now i'm tired and ready to flop into bed.

i was so tired when i got home from work (and at one point during work), that i thought i would be asleep by 9pm, but of course now i'm going to end up getting to bed late when it's all said and done. so more later.


Wednesday, August 16, 2006

I'm hotz baby!... 

so i'm smokin'. the other night, i was having a late night dinner (eating breakfast foods technically) at IHOP with mayhem and these older women passed by us to leave. they ran up to me and started gushing about what gorgeous skin i had and how beautiful i was. they told me to keep doing whatever i was doing with my skin so i'd look better at their age than they did. it was kind of awkward, but also hilarious.

know what i HATE?! when i am dying to talk to somebody and i can't get hold of them. tonight i have been crawling the walls to talk to three different people and haven't gotten to talk to ANY of them! no, make that four. i got to talk with one of them for just an instant at work, but it was in public and i couldn't say or ask for the updates that i really wanted. i said i'd call her back tonight, but now that i have i just get voicemail. damn it all.


Sunday, August 13, 2006


My computer had to go into the shop to get a boo-boo fixed so i couldn't post for the past several days. we are now reunited, though, so i'm back at it.

i tried to have a relaxing weekend, but that seems to be the unattainable lock ness monster for me. i suspect that it could exist, yet i grasp at air whenever i try to find it.

mayhem is a cause of stress. and fun of course. but he just can't relax anymore. i used to be the one who was required to do a ton of stuff on the weekend and had to write papers and stuff while mayhem just relaxed and slept all weekend. i used to resent it and wish for a time like that for myself. now that i have the potential, mayhem has obligations and things to do. he's also been getting snippy with me when i try to push for doing nothing. it's frustrating. he already made this weekend stressful and we had to do a bunch of BS errands and follow through on our "obligations," so this weekend i made him promise me that we would set one relaxing weekend in advance and he would HAVE to grant me that weekend.

i just thought about this... are there some teachers who don't read? we have this image of teachers loving books and hyperventilating as they walk into barnes & noble as they eye all the millions of options for their edification. i bet there are some that haven't read a book outside the classroom requirements in years, though.

and finally on that note, i think i'm going to head to bed and read a little before sleepytime. glad to be back my little babies!


Wednesday, August 02, 2006


oh my goodness i have been gone for way too long. lost. MIA. kidnapped. abandoned. so sorry.

i don't even really know what i've been doing. i've been a little better about eating well. i've decided to try meditating. i'm trying to be better about not starting stupid fights. i can't call mayhem tonight because his phone can't accept any calls. that really sucks because i only started my resolution about not starting stupid fights AFTER starting a stupid fight with mayhem last night. he came over to help me out, but he took too long to agree with me about something, so i started calling him a jerk. just playfully, but i was play-pouting when he left. i tried calling him back to make sure he knew i was just kidding when i discovered his phone couldn't accept calls until he fixed it. those damn people who say stuff about not having regrets... great idea, but you have to be a good person all the time to pull that off. here i thought i was kidding, but then i still got this nagging feeling about it.

i'm starting to feel a little more generous now. i tend to feel stingy or selfish sometimes, but i had a moment today when a colleague had something similar to what i had. i was willing to donate my item for a good cause and the other employee was very excited about keeping her item. i'm generally the one who feels guilted into donating something. but i was more excited about being generous. i'm turning over a new leaf.

as i write, i'm realizing my basic goal is to live the best life possible and be the best person i can, in every sense of the concept. i am trying to eat well, work out, have good karma, yadda yadda. guess that about sums it all up.

so once again, i'm back to asking what you guys would like to hear about from me. are you ready for me to just shut up and go quietly into the sunset? would you rather hear about certain aspects of my life over others? since i've had such a break in posting, i'm certainly interested in hearing what the remaining vocal readers would like to read from me. thanks in advance and lotsa love people!


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