Saturday, July 30, 2005
Mayday...
so you didn't get a post yesterday. it was a weird day. stress, nerves, laughter, friends, satisfaction, guilt trips, tears, pizza, unhappiness, endings.
i can't say i know what my life holds. with the current status of things, i can't even predict what tomorrow will bring.
i wonder how much of this drama i unnecessarily inflict on myself. i grew up defending myself, and at times i think i never learned how to take down that guard for more than just a temporary occasion. after being together for over half a decade i will have periods of ease and happiness with us. yet my instinct still makes me react the same way in the heat of the moment that i have done for all of my life. i'd rather hit the eject button and parachute out of the burning plane than go down trapped inside.
it's an interesting predicament when interviewers ask those typical interview questions. they ask to know about you, but they mean that they want to know about the business you. they ask about your greatest weakness, but they mean as it pertains to my business. you both read between the lines. you end up essentially lying. my greatest weakness is that i don't want to be hurt, but i'll tell you about my greatest weakness as it would relate to you and possibly hiring me. you want to know about my greatest strength, well it would have nothing to do with the person you may one day interact with in the office. so of what you'll know and care about with me, my greatest asset is that i'm a hard worker.
if mathemeticians are right that there is a formula for everything, then the formula for my relationship must be based around x=irony and y=manic depressive changes as soon as things get too good.
|
The official stuff...
|
